


Worthy (Sequel to The Way I Saw It)

by kumo_is_kumo



Category: SHINee
Genre: Angst, Fluff, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-08
Updated: 2020-04-08
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:34:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23543956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kumo_is_kumo/pseuds/kumo_is_kumo
Summary: There were two different persons; with two different personalities. There were also heartbreaks and misunderstandings, but in the end, everything was worthy enough. (Sequel to The Way I Saw It)©2014
Relationships: Kim Jonghyun/Kim Kibum | Key
Kudos: 3





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Prequel to [The Way I Saw It](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23543917/chapters/56473237)
> 
> Originally posted on

For Jonghyun, meeting lots of people was usual. They were pretty, handsome, nice, easy-going, and so on. But, he had never met someone that attractive like Kim Kibum. 

It was that one fine day when he suddenly got no activity in the morning and he happened to scroll down his contact list to find someone to call. His eyes stopped at the name of ‘Choi Minho’—his junior in high school. They were ones good friend and then Jonghyun got the idea of calling him. 

The sudden call turned out to be the re-beginning of their friendship and one week later, Jonghyun was invited to come to where Minho was currently working. He worked at a gym and Jonghyun loved working out. 

That was also the first time he met Kibum. 

He was so pretty, beautiful, attractive, hot; Jonghyun was left speechless. He had never met someone like him before. His heart beat so fast and Jonghyun thought _‘is this what people say with love at the first sight?’_ Silly, yes. But that was what Jonghyun really felt. Kim Kibum was just perfection. 

But then, there was only one bad news. Kim Kibum was such a cold-hearted person. 

Well, Jonghyun was not Jonghyun if he gave up too quick. 

***

For Kibum, meeting lots of people was usual. They were pretty, handsome, nice, easy-going, and so on. But, he had never met someone that attractive like Kim Jonghyun. 

It was that one fine day when he got to work like usual and when he pushed the glass door open, he was greeted with Minho saying ‘good morning’ to him and a pair of foreign eyes staring at him. He was about to ignore it if Minho didn’t pull him aside and introduced him to his friend. 

His name was Kim Jonghyun and he surely was the first person that caught Kibum’s attention that fast. His previous relationships were failed, they were broken and they were bastard. But then this Jonghyun had the most beautiful brown eyes that he had ever seen. 

But, no. Every man was same. Except Minho, of course. 

He knew this Jonghyun was hitting on him. Why not? He was practically staring at him and Kibum held back a smirk. No one could resist his beauty. 

He ignored him, turning on his heels and walked away while swaying his curvy hips. 

No, Kibum would never be deceived again with that kind of sweet talks. 

***

  
Jonghyun tried his best to grab this beauty’s attention. But Kibum had to ignore him all over like that. Seriously, Jonghyun fell so hard for this person. He had never tried this hard just for having someone’s attention on him. Kibum was an exception now. 

He came almost everyday to the gym, to work out and of course to talk to Kibum. He was so cold but Jonghyun knew he should have this soft side in him. He just knew it. 

All of his efforts of talking and blabbering were just failed, until one day. Kibum talked to him first and that was new. 

“What do you want, Jonghyun?” 

“I want you to have a date with me.” Jonghyun was Jonghyun. He was so stubborn that his own sister sometimes wanted to choke him. 

“No.” Kibum replied him with that cold voice of his and Jonghyun felt his smile faltered. But no, he should not show him any trace of disappointment. 

“Why?” asked Jonghyun with a small pout. He didn’t know why Kibum still couldn’t see his charm. He was sure that Kibum was just as attracted as him. 

“Because I don’t know you.”Kibum answered him while rolling his eyes. Jonghyun just kept his smile and grinned to him. 

“You can know me more if you want to go for a date with me!” 

Kibum simply ignored him back and Jonghyun sighed. He was so tired of his ignorant self for God’s sake. He didn’t know why did he do all of this but he knew that he was attracted to Kibum so bad. No, he fell for Kibum and his heart was beating so fast everytime he stared at him. If it was not love, then what was it? 

***

For the next month, Jonghyun kept on pestering him, calling him ‘cutie’, or ‘pretty’, and even ‘Bummie’ and Kibum was surely enjoyed all the attention. He just didn’t want to admit it. He kept on repeating in his mind _‘He is a jerk. Just like all other men.’_

On one fine day, he snapped. 

“Seriously, Jonghyun! Get away from me!” 

Jonghyun was a bit surprised at his sudden snapping but then he forced a grin. He ignored the way Kibum threw the hatred glare to him and he turned the blind eyes. Such a stupid puppy in love he was, he knew it. 

“Won’t you go on a date with me?” He still hadn’t given up. Hell, it looked like he would never give up. 

Kibum sighed and rubbed his temple, “Fine. But only one date.” 

At the answer, Jonghyun’s eyes lit up in that happiness and he grinned so wide. 

“Why only one date?” whined Jonghyun. He should try his luck, right? Who knew Kibum changed his mind. Kibum glared at him, “One date or not at all.” At the words, Jonghyun sealed his lips in a tight line and shook his head. At least maybe after one date, he could ask Kibum for another date. 

Jonghyun grinned and jumped on his spot after telling Kibum that he would inform him later about the date. He quickly walked out from the room where Kibum was and jumping on his spot in happiness. Kibum was going on a date with him! Was it a dream? It wasn’t, right? 

Jonghyun pinched his arm and groaned at the pain. It hurt! Meant it was real and Kibum was for real having a scheduled date with him! Woohoo! 

Kibum ignored the way Jonghyun looked like a very cute puppy and he kept his eyes on his bag, pretending to search for something while he held himself from smiling too wide. Jonghyun was surely stubborn and he had a thing for stubborn guy, to be honest. 

Jonghyun was attractive, he knew it. He sometimes found himself staring at Jonghyun’s abs for a moment before he shook the thought away. Looks could be deceiving. He had lots of experience about this before. They looked so nice, so good, so gentle, and when they wanted something, they would turn to this bastard, fucking jerk who only wanted to get into your pants. 

Kibum would never let the same thing happened to him again. No more. 

***

Kibum came fifteen minutes late to the cafe where they had a date and found Jonghyun was waiting eagerly for him. He greeted him with a quick smile and sat down lazily, watching Jonghyun talked to him. 

“What do you want to drink?” 

“Anything’s fine,” murmured Kibum while propping his chin with his hand; eyes staring out the window. Jonghyun smiled at him, Kibum had to admit that his smile was so charming. 

The older man ordered him a strawberry milkshake and Kibum simply thanked him. “So, Kibum, how are you today?” 

“Fine.” 

“Did you sleep well?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Um... Do you want to order something else?” asked Jonghyun, feeling nervous with Kibum sitting across him. Kibum shook his head and took a sip of his milkshake. Jonghyun bit his lip. What should they talk about? 

“Um, is work fine?” 

Kibum lift an eyebrow but nodded anyway. Very good, way to ruin the mood, Kim Jonghyun. 

“Uh... what do you want to talk about, Kibum?” 

“I don’t know. You talk, I listen.” 

Jonghyun gripped onto his fists in nervousness and he cleared his throat. Kibum was surely not cooperating with him. Did he pity him and he only came to make him happy? 

“You know... Uh... I’m a musician.” 

Kibum stared at him in interest for a split second before drifting his attention away. Jonghyun grinned when he felt like Kibum had an interest in hearing him. “Yeah, I write music for my company. I work for SM, you know that, right?” 

Kibum nodded his head while humming. Jonghyun was so happy that Kibum finally paid some attention to him. “You know some groups? Like SHINee, f(x)? I write songs for them.” 

“I see.” 

“Uh, uh, is that good?” asked Jonghyun while pointing to the milkshake. Kibum stared at the glass and shrugged. “Yeah. So so.” 

“O-Oh, I’m glad.” 

And then it was silence. Where was your noisy self when you needed it, Kim Jonghyun? 

_‘Uh, think about something, Jonghyun! Think!’_

Then he caught the sight of one drop of milkshake smeared on Kibum’s lower lip. He grabbed a tissue and leaned forward, holding the tissue for Kibum to take while murmuring, “You have something...” 

Kibum backed away quickly and glared at him. “Don’t get too close. It’s disturbing.” 

“I-I’m sorry...” 

Jonghyun was surely hurt by the way Kibum acted around him. He didn’t know what was wrong with him that Kibum seemed to despise him that much. Maybe he was indeed disturbing? 

“Um, Kibum,” 

“What?” responded Kibum uninterestedly while sipping his milkshake to the last drops. Jonghyun sighed and forced a smile. “Should we get going? You looked... tired.” 

“Oh, it’s done already? Good.” 

Kibum simply waved at him and walked away, leaving Jonghyun standing alone in front of the cafe with longing in his eyes. Kibum was not interested with him. 

***

Jonghyun came to the gym on Monday and was greeted with Minho’s question about the date. He remembered the awkward situation and forced a smile to Minho, “It didn’t go that well but it was still nice.” 

Minho frowned at his response and Jonghyun just shrugged it off. “Was it that bad, hyung?” 

“It was... I don’t know. He didn’t really pay attention to me and I think... he didn’t like me that much... Should I give up?” 

Minho grabbed onto his shoulder, staring into his eyes while chanting the continuous ‘No’. “Hyung, please, don’t give up yet. He is clearly interested in you, but he is too stubborn to admit it. Please, hyung?” 

Jonghyun parted his lips, but no words coming out before he sighed and nodded his head in defeat. Maybe he should try a bit more. 

Minho nudged him and pointed at the direction of the door with his chin when the sound of the door opened was heard. Jonghyun turned around and found Kibum entering the building, still with his gorgeous self. He grinned when he saw how adorable Kibum looked with his clothes. Kibum spared a single glance towards him and then turned away. Jonghyun pouted like a little pup and shrugged, not really expecting any other expression from Kibum when he looked at him. 

Weeks turned into months and Jonghyun was still being Jonghyun. Stubborn and noisy. Kibum had the tendency to roll his eyes everytime Jonghyun was moving closer to him. Seriously, didn’t this man have any work or what? 

He knew that he was indeed very attractive. Kibum heard that a lot. He knew that Jonghyun looked like a good person but he still couldn’t trust someone that fast. He trusted Minho; he had been there since they were kids and there was no need to doubt Minho’s loyalty. 

But then... someone so handsome and attractive came, hitting on him, and Kibum had some bad experiences similar with this. 

Sometimes he caught Jonghyun staring at him, practically undressing him with his eyes. Kibum knew that sometimes he wanted that attention. Sometimes he swayed his hips a little bit over, walking like a cat here and there. Sometimes he wore clothes that were showing his curvy body. He knew that. 

But sometimes Jonghyun was too stupid to hide his interest with his body. 

“For fuck’s sake! Get the fuck away from me!” Kibum snapped all of sudden, and he even surprised that he could snap that loud. Jonghyun was staring blankly at the wall beside Kibum and when the younger man snapped like that, he jumped on his seat. Who would expect Kibum would snap all of sudden? 

“E-Eh?” 

“Don’t think I don’t know that you are practically drooling over my ass. You only want to get into my pants. Fine, what do you want to do now? You want to fuck me, right? Where and when? Just get it over and leave me the fuck alone!” Kibum hissed the words; his tone was full with venom that Jonghyun felt shiver ran down his body. 

Jonghyun tried to defend himself, “I-I’m not—”

“Yeah, and Santa is real,” snapped Kibum again. Jonghyun stared with parted lips, he just stared but the hurt was clear in his eyes. He cleared his throat to break the awkward silence before taking a step back. He had to do something or the tears that starting to well in his lids could fall anytime soon. He didn’t like being snapped like that, especially from someone that he liked so much. 

“I-I have to make a c-call,” and he walked out from the room. He ran out from the building, escaping to the emergency door which he knew would be no one there. He sighed and rubbed his face. A tear fell and he crouched down, hugging his knees close. Who thought that loving someone could be this hurting? 

He knew that Kibum was clearly not interested on him. He realized that already, thank you very much. But then he also didn’t know why he tried so hard just to win over Kibum’s heart. He could get any other person outside, he had this charm and he was simply handsome. 

Jonghyun sniffed and wiped his wet eyes with his sleeve before hitting his cheeks lightly. He forced a smile before deciding that he would be better go before Kibum snapped again at him. But his jacket was still in the building. He sighed as he realized that he had to face Kibum again. 

***

Kibum sighed as he saw Jonghyun sprinted off from the room. He turned around and was greeted with Minho’s burning eyes. 

“What?” He snapped. 

“Sometimes I don’t think I know you. Sometimes I think you are not the Kibum that I used to know. You don’t have to be that harsh towards him, you know,” Minho spoke lowly to him. Kibum sighed again and his tensed shoulder slumped down. 

“What do you want to say, Minho?” 

“Stop being this unknown person and give me back the old Kibum. This Kibum hurts so many people and I don’t like it.” 

He rubbed his temple and sighed. Minho was talking nonsense again. “I don’t get it, Minho! I’m still me!” 

“No, you are not. The old Kibum wouldn’t act that rude and would always hear what people say.” 

Why did Minho act as if he knew everything about Kibum? Sure, Minho knew almost everything about him. 

“Minh—”

“Give him a chance. He is serious with you. You won’t meet a good man like him any other time. All you need to do is giving him a chance to prove himself that he is different. You hurt him too many already and if I were him, I wouldn’t want to come back.” Minho talked in this serious expression that Kibum felt the sudden urge to just believe him. He didn’t know. He was just so confused. 

Right after Minho finished talking, the glass door was slowly being pushed and Jonghyun entered back. “S-Sorry, I-I just want to grab my jacket. I’ll go quickly.” 

He rushed to the coat hanger on the corner of the room and Kibum frowned. He was sure that he saw something unusual, but what was it? Jonghyun forced a smile to Minho and left them alone without sparing any glance at Kibum; the door closing slowly behind his back. 

Kibum knew what was that something. With wide eyes, he turned to Minho. 

“Did you see that?” asked Minho slowly and Kibum hesitantly nodded, “His eyes were so puffy...” 

“A man who only wants your ass won’t cry over your insult,” said Minho before leaving him as well. 

Kibum frowned. Did Jonghyun cry? Over that insult? That simple insult? 

Okay, that was not a simple insult. Kibum knew it. But then should he cry? Should his face look that miserable? Should he look that sad? 

Kibum couldn’t help but felt the sudden tug in his heart. He bit his lip down, feeling so guilty to make someone as cheerful and noisy as Jonghyun to cry. He knew that it was his fault this time and he had to make it up to him. 

But how? 

***

A week later, Jonghyun was once again back to his cheerful self. He felt like he was disturbing Kibum. He understood now why Kibum despised him so much; that was why he locked himself in his house. Maybe he should take some space from Kibum. 

“Hey, Minho!” greeted Jonghyun while pushing the glass door. He saw how Minho’s face went like he was relieved when he saw him entered the building. He grinned; he understood that Minho was worrying him. 

“Hi, hyung. Where did you go?” 

“I... Nothing, I just lazed around at home,” said him and grinned stupidly. He just didn’t want to worry Minho more. That whole week might be worrying Minho that bad. Minho smiled and patted him on his shoulder. 

Kibum walked slowly, crossing the road while keeping his hands in his pockets. It had been a week and Jonghyun was nowhere to be found. He was a bit worried with him but he didn’t want to show it. He didn’t want to show Minho that he was right about Jonghyun. 

The wind blew and Kibum closed his eyes to avoid any dusts from entering his eyes. Once he opened them, he gasped. That was Jonghyun. He saw Jonghyun entering the building. Jonghyun was back. 

Smiling a bit, Kibum fastened his walk, but before he could held himself back, he was practically running there. He made sure that he didn’t smile when he pushed the door. 

Panting, he found Minho and Jonghyun were staring at him in surprise. Of course, who would expect that Kim Kibum would be running and panting like crazily over seeing someone? 

His eyes locked on Jonghyun’s figure. Nothing was different. Yet he couldn’t stop staring at him even though his mind was practically blank at the moment. 

“Hyung?” Minho called him hesitantly and Kibum broke his trance, clearing his throat. He closed the door and stood stiff on his spot, clueless about what to do. 

Upon Kibum’s arrival, Jonghyun fidgeted uncomfortably on his spot and he tugged onto Minho’s shirt. Being in the same room with Kibum felt like choking him, moreover if he remembered about the last encounter that they had. He didn’t want Kibum to snap at him again. “I-I will go to the training room. Um, see you around, Minho.” 

Not giving Minho any chance to answer, he just turned on his heels. Kibum felt his breath was stuck in his throat and when Jonghyun was about to walk away, Kibum’s stuttering voice stopped him from doing so. “H-Hey, Jonghyun,” 

With wide eyes, Jonghyun turned around in surprise, not expecting that Kibum would call him that way. Kibum parted his lips before closing them again. He sighed and gripped his blouse. “Can we talk?” 

Jonghyun stared at him as if asking ‘are you serious’ and Kibum could only stared hopefully at him. Jonghyun felt Minho nudged him on his ribs and he looked at him, seeing Minho motioning at Kibum, mouthing the word ‘go’. Jonghyun hesitantly nodded and he followed Kibum entering one empty training room to talk in private. 

Once the door was closed, Jonghyun found that Kibum was staring at him and he uncomfortably moved his gaze away from the younger man. “Um,” started Kibum and Jonghyun silently waited for him to talk while kept staring at his dark blue sneakers, “I... haven’t seen you for a while.” 

Jonghyun hesitantly nodded his head and sighed. He didn’t like this awkward situation. 

“Uh, Jonghyun... I... There’s something that I have to say. Umm... I’m sorry,” 

Jonghyun felt his round eyes went wide and he instantly snapped his head up to stare at Kibum’s flustered face. The younger man was picking onto his blouse and he took a deep breath before continuing, “for being... you know, bitchy last time.” 

The older man felt like losing his words and all of his vocabulary was stuck in his throat. All he could utter was just, “Why?” 

Kibum shifted his gaze to the poster of someone’s abs on the wall behind Jonghyun’s head before sighing, “I feel... guilty. I guess I was in bad mood last time so... I took it on you. Sorry about that.” 

Jonghyun had his mouth formed in ‘o’ and he slowly nodded his head. “I guess it’s fine...” 

“One more thing!” stopped Kibum before Jonghyun could think that their conversation was over. Jonghyun stared at him questioningly and Kibum shakily asked, “Do you... aish. Go on a lunch with me.” 

If today was not a ‘surprising-Jonghyun-day’ then it would be trick. 

“...what?” 

“I-I said have a lunch with me!” said Kibum with raised voice, maybe he was flustered. Jonghyun could only stare at Kibum. He was really, really not expecting this coming. But, seriously...? Kibum asking him for a lunch? 

“A-Are you serio—”

“I will wait at 12 in front of the lobby,” said Kibum before pushing Jonghyun to open the door; his face red from embarrassment. 

The door opened and he avoided Minho’s gaze on him. “Hyung? What happened?” 

Jonghyun grinned and Kibum quickly walked pass Minho, mumbling the small ‘see you around’ before rushing out from the gym room. Jonghyun shook Minho’s arms and jumped on his spot, “He apologized! And he invited me for a lunch! Did you hear that, Minho?!” 

Minho seemed not believe but Jonghyun was already back to his lovesick-puppy self. He could hear Minho muttering the disbelief ‘really?’ but Jonghyun was already too busy in his mind, replaying the way Kibum asked him for a lunch together. He was adorable, all flustered like that. 

That day, Jonghyun was all smiles and he was practically jumping on his way to the lobby. He caught the sight of Kibum sitting down on the sofa, a fashion magazine on his lap. Once he found Jonghyun staring at him, he closed the magazine and cleared his throat, before mumbling the ‘come on’. Jonghyun nodded his head docilely and followed where Kibum was walking. 

They settled on one small cozy restaurant and Jonghyun was staring at Kibum dreamily. Kibum cleared his throat to break Jonghyun’s stare and he grinned stupidly. Murmuring a soft ‘sorry’, Jonghyun looked through the menu and ordered something simple. Kibum said his order and when the waiter went to grab their ordered dishes, Jonghyun stayed silent, not knowing what to say. He didn’t want to repeat the same mistake; blabbering about himself when Kibum was not even paying attention to him. 

“S-So,” murmured Kibum and Jonghyun’s head snapped up in surprise. 

“Yeah?” 

“H-How are you doing these days?” asked Kibum while playing with a napkin. Jonghyun grinned at the cute act and hummed. “I was busy preparing for some groups comeback. I have to write like... three songs in two weeks...” 

“I-It must be hard...” Kibum responded to him. Jonghyun’s eyes lit up at the response Kibum gave him before he nodded his head. “Yeah, but it’s amazing. I enjoy writing songs and when people get the pleasure from hearing to the songs that I wrote, I would be happier.” 

Kibum stared at him in silence; his heart warmed at the sincerity. He chuckled and covered his mouth from smiling too wide. Jonghyun was staring at him in shock. “W-What?” 

“You know... you are interesting, Jonghyun.” 

“M-Me?” asked Jonghyun while pointing to himself. Kibum smirked and nodded. “Yeah, you.” 

“H-How could you say that?” 

“Of course, you look like a completely asshole like playboys,” at the words, Jonghyun found himself pouting but he grinned nonetheless, “but I think that’s what unique from you.” 

“U-Unique? Me?” Jonghyun was surely an idiot. He could be handsome, but he was pretty idiot sometimes. Kibum chuckled at his expression and nodded. “I... was bad towards you from the beginning so I want us to start over,” said Kibum while crossing his arms over his chest, leaning back to the seat with a cocky smirk on his face. 

“...are you being serious now, Kibum?” 

“I’m not going to repeat myself.” 

Jonghyun stared at him like he was some kind of alien but Kibum thought the expression was cute. He heard Jonghyun blabbered all of his disbelief and when Jonghyun asked, “You are giving me a chance?” Kibum simply nodded his head. 

Yeah. He was giving Jonghyun a chance to prove himself that he was different from those assholes. 

***

They had gone on some dates and Jonghyun was waking up every morning with a smile on his face. Sure, Kibum still didn’t let him hold his hand but he was happy that way. 

He remembered visiting Kibum when he was sick a few days ago. He asked Minho where Kibum was and when the taller boy told him that Kibum was sick at his home, Jonghyun went frantic. He demanded for Kibum’s address and visited him, surprising Kibum who opened the door still in his pajamas. 

Kibum shrugged and let him in, telling him to feel at home while he got back into his room. Jonghyun cooked some delicious porridge along with a pot of warm tea. Kibum thanked him with his attention and sent him a smile. Jonghyun was nearly dying when Kibum smiled at him. Looked like Kibum was starting to open up for him. 

Another working day passed and Jonghyun frowned when he heard the growling sound from the sky. It was about the time Kibum got out from his work and Jonghyun had planned to fetch him up. He tapped his fingers on the steering wheel while waiting for the traffic light to turn. He didn’t want Kibum to get drenched from the rain. He had to fetch him up! 

He arrived at the building when the rain was already pouring. He ran down from his car, sprinting over the building and stood on the lobby. He saw Kibum was playing with his phone, maybe he was waiting for the rain to stop before he could go to home. Jonghyun grinned and walked closer to him. Kibum felt the presence of someone getting closer and his eyes widened when he saw Jonghyun was drenched wet. 

“What are you doing?” 

“Fetching you up. Come on, I’ll take you home.” 

Kibum felt his heart fluttered from Jonghyun’s way to act sweet. He chuckled and stood up. “Alright. You don’t bring any umbrella?” 

Shaking his head no, Jonghyun grinned and lifted up his coat. “Don’t worry. I won’t let you get wet. Come,” 

He covered Kibum completely with his coat, letting himself drenched by the rain pouring from the sky. Kibum stared at his effort and a thankful smile was formed on his lips. He let Jonghyun brought him to his car, opening the door, and buckled the seat belt for him. Jonghyun was too sweet for a guy, seriously. 

Once they arrived in front of his house, Kibum said his thank you repeatedly, making Jonghyun flustered and rubbing the back of his neck. Kibum chuckled before he laughed lightly; waving at Jonghyun with the most sincere smile he had ever given to the man. Jonghyun stared in amazement; Kibum was so pretty and he felt his heart was thumping so fast. Only when Kibum had entered the house Jonghyun had jumped on his seat, punching the air with his fists in happiness. 

At one fine day, Jonghyun was chatting with Minho after having his gym training. He was trying to find Kibum when finally Minho told him that Kibum was having a hard day today. He had lots of sudden job for the day and he wouldn’t be able to have his lunch. Jonghyun bit down his lip and without thinking much further, he went out to the nearest family restaurant and bought a set of complete lunch to take out. 

He slowly walked to where Kibum was working currently, and smiled when he found the younger man was resting for a while. He knocked on the door, silently thanking that no one else was in the room. Kibum opened his eyes from resting and was greeted with the sight of Jonghyun’s head popping in from outside. He let out a soft chuckle at the cute sight and motioning Jonghyun to enter. 

“Minho said you are having lots of jobs today,” said Jonghyun while hiding the lunch box behind his back. Kibum nodded and massaged his neck. “Yeah, indeed I am.” 

“Are you hungry?” 

“Kind of. But I can’t go on for a lunch today since my break time is limited, so I’m—”

“Here,” said Jonghyun while pushing the lunch set into his hands. Kibum stared at the neatly packed lunch before looking up at Jonghyun. “What...?” 

“You... can’t stay hungry. I don’t want you to get sick, so... yeah, eat a lot.” 

Jonghyun rubbed his neck before sprinting to the door, waving his hand. Kibum chuckled at him before laughing a bit. “Thanks!” he shouted after Jonghyun closed the door. He was sure Jonghyun still could hear him though. 

Jonghyun fists-pumped in celebration before he skipped along the hallway. But then he thought; if Kibum had lots of jobs for the day, what time would he finish? 

He walked to the lobby, asking about everything on the Kibum’s jobs schedule and they said that they didn’t know about it. Jonghyun sighed. He could only wait. 

He waited outside the building in his car. He watched how people were slowly passing by his car, going back from work, from school; going back home and Kibum had yet to come out. He took the spare time to write a song; three hours passed before he realized it. 

It was seven when finally Kibum walked out from the building with the tired looking face. Jonghyun quickly put down his papers and pencil, going out form the car and called out his name. Kibum was so surprised to see him there and he walked towards his car. “What are you doing here?” 

Jonghyun grinned and bit his lip shyly. “I... was waiting for you.” 

With one eyebrow furrowed, Kibum sighed, “How long did you wait?” 

“I... don’t know? I didn’t get back home at all so you could say that I waited... that long.” 

Kibum shook his head and crossed his arms on his chest. “You waited for me so you could take me home?” 

“Y-Yes,” he didn’t know why but Jonghyun felt intimidated with Kibum staring at him like that. Kibum smirked, “You could be an idiot sometimes, Jonghyun. But it was sweet, so I will let you off. Come on, I’m tired.” 

He pushed Jonghyun away and got into his car. Jonghyun grinned and quickly ran towards the driver seat, driving along the chilly night to Kibum’s house. 

Once they were arrived, Jonghyun turned to him and said, “Don’t forget to eat your dinner, Kibum.” 

The younger man stopped for a while before replying, “Have you eaten your dinner?” 

“No, I will just skip,” said Jonghyun with a stupid grin on his face. Kibum tsk-ed at him and glared, “You told me to eat my dinner and here you are going skip it? Get in. Dinner with me.” And with that, Kibum got out from the car, unlocking the front door to his house. Jonghyun stared at Kibum’s back with a shocked grin, before jumping out from the car when Kibum glared at him through the opened door. 

“Don’t make me wait.” 

“Yes, yes!” 

***

It was one fine day in December. Jonghyun had planned it all along. The Christmas was just a week around and if Kibum said yes, then this would be their first Christmas together. 

Yes, Jonghyun planned on confessing. He knew that he should have done it sooner but he was afraid that Kibum would reject him. Sometimes Kibum would give him hints of being equally attracted but some other times, Kibum would act so cold to him that he would think over about confessing. But now he had decided that he would do it. 

He grabbed the flowers and that special box before smiling nervously to himself. Tonight was such a beautiful night, Jonghyun chose to not driving his car and walked. He pushed the glass door, greeting Minho who was about to get back home. 

“Jonghyun hyung?” 

He grinned and put his finger over his lips, telling Minho to lower his voice. He didn’t want his plan to be ruined. Minho stared at him questioningly but then in a few seconds, a grin lit up on his face. 

“Hey, Minho. Is Kibum here?” 

“Yeah, he is still inside I think. Hyung, are you going to confess?” 

He blushed and rubbed the back of his head. “Yeah. Are you going to go home, Minho?” 

“I am. It’s about time, hyung. I thought you would never make this official. I’m tired of seeing you both beat around the bush. I hope the best for you, hyung! Fighting!” 

Minho was surely the best dongseng ever. He grinned back and waved at Minho, now left alone. 

Now, let’s see. Where was Kibum? 

Jonghyun peeked into Kibum’s work room and found no one. Oh, don’t tell him that Kibum was at home already? Jonghyun hissed and walked towards the locker room. He had been here too often that everyone in the building knew him already. He could walk freely as if he worked here. 

But then, he heard that. 

_“Kibum, stop wasting your time with him.”_

Kibum? Someone was talking with Kibum? In the locker room? 

_“Get away from me. What do you want?”_ He could hear Kibum’s cold voice. He heard that kind of tone a lot before. 

Jonghyun was standing right in front of the door. The little window with tinted glass was the only thing that showed the conversing people inside. It was Kibum’s voice. Clear as crystal. 

He knew that he should not eavesdrop on their conversation, so he wanted to wait outside. But then what he heard next was not what he expected. 

_“I want you to stop hanging around that Jonghyun kid. You are getting too close to him and I don’t like it.”_

Jonghyun stopped himself before he could turn on his heels. Even from the tinted window, he could see the silhouette of that someone held onto Kibum. He even let someone else touched him like that but not him? His heart clenched at the thought but he stayed to hear more. It had his name after all. 

_“What is it for you? You stalk me.”_ He could hear that Kibum was annoyed. 

_“You know that I want you from the very beginning, Kibum. And now you are hanging with that kid.”_

Who was this person? Was he close to Kibum? 

_“So?”_

_“Tell me. What is your relationship with him?”_

Honestly, he was kind of curious of what would be Kibum’s answer. He was wondering what Kibum was thinking about their relationship after those dates that they had. 

_“There’s nothing between us.”_

His heart sank. 

_“He is only your friend, right?”_

_“Maybe.”_

Then his head was spinning in confusion. 

_“Then what is that Jonghyun kid to you?”_

Yes, what was I to you? 

_“No one. Jonghyun is no one to me. He is no different than you, annoying and never knows when to stop. Now get the fuck away from me.”_

Oh. 

The answer was so clear. The rejection was so clear. There was no need to confess anymore. 

His fist gripped onto the bouquet of flowers; the stems were crushed from the pressure. He never knew that heartbroken would be this painful. He took a step back, walking away from the spot before eyeing at the flowers and the blue velvet box in his hands. 

He threw them. 

They had no use. 

With heart thumping so fast against his ribcage, Jonghyun made his way out from the building, eyes blurred with tears. He settled down on the frozen bench, staring up at the night sky blankly without thinking about anything. Kibum’s previous statements were echoing loud enough in his ears. 

His tears scrolled down before he could prevent it. Jonghyun knew that he was such a softie, such a baby trapped in a grown up man body. But he couldn’t help it. Men could also cry. 

He knew that he would hiccup whenever he cried. But he didn’t know why he cried without letting any sound out this time. He just felt all of his energy was leaving him already and he felt weak. 

The echoing voice of Kibum saying ‘ _There’s nothing between us_ ’ and the sentence of ‘ _Jonghyun is no one to me_ ’ were enough to make him sighed. He stared as his cold breath was dissipating into the cold air, equally at the same state with his cold heart. 

He had one hand gripped onto his chest, little sobbing escaped his lips and then he sighed again. 

“ _‘No one’_...”murmured Jonghyun hoarsely. Kibum was so cruel. Should he say it that clear? Should he talk it like that? With venom in his voice? Without any affection in his voice? 

Was Jonghyun really had no place in his heart? 

Did he pity Jonghyun and he gave him a chance only to make fun of him? 

He knew that he was such a stubborn, annoying bastard but if Kibum didn’t want him, he could just say it clearly from the very beginning. No need to lead him like this. Giving him a high hope and crushed him down into pieces. 

He stayed like that for a long time; not moving even for a slightest bit. 

Maybe Jonghyun should really go away. That way, Kibum would be very happy and he would be free from the burden of meeting with Jonghyun anymore. 

Sniffing, Jonghyun rummaged into his pocket and pulled out his phone. He was hesitating whether this would be a good decision or it would hurt him more. But then, what was left for him to sacrifice? Kibum had taken his heart and ripped it mercilessly right in front of his eyes. 

He called his boss. _“Yeah, Jonghyun?”_

“Hey, hyung. Is the offer...still available?”murmured Jonghyun into the phone. He was still a bit confused with this. 

_“Um, of course. We offered this only to you and Jinki. But Jinki had made it clear that he refused it. What is it? Are you going to take it, Jonghyun?”_

“Yeah. I... I’ll take it. Just plan everything well...and as soon as possible.” 

_“You sure, Jonghyun? No turning back after you say yes.”_

“Yes, I’m... sure. Thanks a lot, hyung.” 

He hung up the call and sighed, before rising up and walked away, went back home. He was hoping to walk back with Kibum when he planned all of this but then he guessed his plan was such a failure from the beginning.


	2. Chapter 2

Kibum sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. His co-worker Donghyun was being an asshole and never stopped bugging him. He made it clear that he had no interest in him yet he kept on pestering him.

Why did he have to bring Jonghyun’s name in this? That bastard.

He had no choice rather than to lie and said those words about Jonghyun. He knew that people like Donghyun would back off once he said that kind of words.

Truth to be told, Kibum knew that his feelings for Jonghyun had changed. From this annoying, disturbing man, Jonghyun had come up to be this sweet, wonderful man that was in Kibum’s criteria for being an ideal man. He just had to make sure a bit more that Jonghyun was the right person.

But he wondered. He didn’t see Jonghyun coming today. Maybe he was busy? Oh, maybe he was preparing for another group comeback? Yeah, he might be.

Kibum frowned when he remembered that tomorrow would be his day off. The thought of not seeing Jonghyun hit him but then he shrugged, thinking that maybe Jonghyun would come to his house, being the same stubborn man he was.

But, boy, he was wrong.

He waited and waited for two days of his day off but Jonghyun was nowhere to be found knocking his door. He thought of asking Minho but Kibum felt his pride was floating high. He was not that kind of man.

He was back into work in no time and the first thing that he wanted to find was Jonghyun’s stupid grin. Kibum frowned when he didn’t see anything and shrugged, walking towards the locker room to put his bag down. But then he found Minho, staring blankly into his locker, so he walked towards him.

Why was he staring at a bouquet of flowers? Moreover, they were wilted?

He tapped Minho on his shoulder and asked, “What are you doing, Minho? What’s that?”

“H-Hey, Kibum hyung,” answered Minho hesitantly. Why? What was wrong? Minho didn’t seem that good. Kibum ran his eyes around, seeking for Jonghyun and decided that it would be wise to ask him. “Hey, Minho, well, I don’t see...your friend?”

He didn’t expect that Minho would snap at him. He was truly did not expecting that.

“Are you done with this shit?”

Kibum gaped at him and frowned. “What are you talking about...?”

Minho simply glared. “I knew you don’t think him as someone worth your time. Why even bother to see him, huh?!”

They were the words that he spoke to that bastard co-worker of his... Kibum had his eyes widened, mouth opening and closing as he lost his words. Minho knew? “...y-you heard it?”

“Yeah... so did him.”

Him? Him who? Who would be listening to that as well? Him wouldn’t be—

Kibum gasped and his face paled, “J-Jonghyun too...?”

Minho chuckled bitterly and got closer to him, “Yeah. It was such a great thing that he didn’t go with his confession since you are way too good for him, don’t you think so?”

Kibum gripped onto his arm and he could feel himself trembling. This was not what supposed to be happened. “H-How... What do y-you—”

“He was going to confess. But then you ruined everything so perfectly with your beautiful speech, thank you very much.” Minho emphasized every word with clear venom and Kibum felt his heart thumped so fast.

So, Jonghyun heard... He heard him saying those cruel lies.

Minho dumped the bouquet of flowers and one particular box into his hands. “And they were supposed to be yours from three days ago.”

From three days ago... Was that why Jonghyun didn’t come to his house? Was he avoiding him?

Minho walked away angrily, leaving Kibum staring blankly but then he knew that he had to explain this. He ran towards Minho, grabbing his arm tightly to prevent him from walking away. “M-Minho, I didn’t mean it! I-I was just saying that to make Donghyun stop talking! I-I didn’t—”

“And why are you saying this to me? You should say this to him!” barked Minho in front of his face and Kibum knew that he was right. He should have explained this to Jonghyun.

He bit his lip and stared at the wilted tulips, and then stopped at the blue velvet box. He shakily opened it and there was a card in it.

‘It took me a long time to do this but then I decided to confess. I fell in love with you, too deep already. Would you be mine?’

There was a necklace in the box, a beautiful necklace. Kibum felt his heart clenched in pain as he stared at the beautiful star-shaped necklace. Jonghyun was going to give him this.

“T-This is...”

***

Jonghyun stared at the busy sight of the international airport, sighing as he thought over his decision. Was it wide for him to do this?

Minho. He still didn’t know about his decision. He should call him, at least to tell him before he went away.

“Hyung?” Minho answered the call confusedly.

“Hey, Minho. How are you doing?” greeted Jonghyun with a cheerful voice.

“Jonghyun hyung, I haven’t seen you for a while. Where were you?” Kibum’s head snapped up when he heard Jonghyun’s name came out from Minho’s mouth. Was it Jonghyun?

I was just around. Look, Minho, I... There’s something that I have to tell you. I got an offer from my company to move to Paris and... I accepted it,” said Jonghyun with a low sigh and he could guess that Minho was surprised with his sudden news.

“What? Hyung, you are not serious, right?” Minho exclaimed with horror on his face and Kibum felt like his heart sank down. What? What happened with Jonghyun?

Jonghyun chuckled and smiled sadly. “I’m serious, Minho. I’m sorry that I haven’t been able to tell you sooner but I was packing for a few days and—”

“Packing? Hyung, when—” What was it? What was it with packing? What was Minho talking about?

“It’s today, Minho. I’m sorry about that.” He said the news with a sigh and he heard how Minho was so shocked, “Hyung!”

“The sooner is better. I’m needed in the company branch in Paris so I think it would be the best if I could go as soon as possible. Say, Minho, you will take care of yourself, right?” He tried to argue with Minho.

“Hyung, why are you saying like that?” What did Jonghyun say? Why was Minho’s face looked like that?

Jonghyun chuckled and sighed slowly. “I hope you take care of yourself, Minho. You are my favorite dongseng, you know. I... I will tell you everything that you still don’t know later, but not now. I’m not ready.” Yes, he was not ready to tell Minho about his heart-breaking story. He didn’t want Minho to blame Kibum.

“Hyung, when is...?” asked Minho slowly and Jonghyun smiled sadly.

“In ten minutes. I’ll get into the plane in ten minutes. I think this will be the last time we talk, Minho. I’m not sure when I will be back to Korea but I’m sure you can wait for your favorite hyung, right?”

“Hyung, I’m going there!” Where did Minho want to go? Why did he want to go?

“No, no need, Minho. You won’t make it. Just, take care of yourself and...” Jonghyun sighed before continuing, “can you tell something to... Kibum?”

He didn’t think he could tell Kibum directly. He was still so hurt from his words.

“W-What is it, hyung?” Minho stared at the man who was still gripping onto his arm.

Kibum stared as Minho put the phone over his ear and he was about to say something if Minho didn’t cover his mouth from talking.

Jonghyun took a deep breath and then he spoke, “Tell Kibum that it was such a great opportunity to know him and... he was such a great friend. Tell him that I’m sorry for all the disturbance and annoyance that I caused for him and... goodbye. Just don’t tell him anything about my feeling, Minho.”

Kibum had one tear rolled down his cheek and Jonghyun’s words were repeating in his head. Where? Where was Jonghyun going? Why was he saying things like that? Like... separation?

“I will, hyung. I will make sure he hears everything clearly as you want,” said Minho while staring at Kibum’s troubled face.

“It’s time, Minho. I’ll see you soon later. I will miss you a lot, dongseng.”

“Me too, hyung. Take care. Call me a lot, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, sure,” laughed Jonghyun and hang up the call. He sighed and stood up; hearing the call echoing in the airport, telling him that his flight was soon.

Kibum stared blankly at the ground and he heard Minho sighed.

“W-Where... Where is he going? What is he talking about? Why is he saying goodbye?”

“He moved away. To Paris,” said Minho silently and Kibum felt his whole body trembled. He clutched onto Minho’s arm, by now the tears were scrolling down his face. “W-Why is he going? Why?”

“His job moved him there... and you.”

“M-Me?” His heart was thumping so hard that it hurt.

“You said you wanted him to get away from you, right? You said he was so annoying and man like him only wanted your ass and didn’t know when to stop, right?” Minho scolded him with so much anger in his voice. Kibum gaped, feeling another roll of his fresh tears on his cheeks.

“I... I—”

Minho yanked his arm away. “This is what I hate from you, Kibum hyung. You hated those people that used you. They left after they hurt you, but now... he left after you hurt him.”

Did I? Did I hurt him? Did I break his heart?

“W-When does he—”

“Now. His plane is taking off right now.”

And Minho walked away, leaving him alone in his misery.

Kibum gripped onto the flowers and the box, sniffing as his tears were not listening to his order to stop rolling. “I haven’t told him that I like him too...” whispered Kibum weakly, blurred eyes locked onto the necklace.

***

Kibum locked himself in his house, refusing to move from his bed. He cried so hard when he remembered what he had said to Jonghyun and what Jonghyun had heard him saying.

He didn’t mean to say it like that. He was just saying that to get rid of people that he didn’t like. He was serious in liking Jonghyun, and when he was already sure about his feeling, Jonghyun was gone.

He ignored the calls from his co-worker and Minho for the whole first week, not having any energy to answer their questions. He knew Minho was so worried with him, coming to his house and knocking on the door continuously.

Kibum felt like losing the most important person in his life. He had the chance before but then he ignored it just because his own silly insecurity.

He wanted Jonghyun. He wanted to tell Jonghyun his feeling. He wanted to tell Jonghyun that he liked him... and maybe he had already loved him.

If.. If Jonghyun was no longer here... maybe Kibum could be the one to go to Jonghyun. If Jonghyun was following him around before, now it was the time for Kibum to do the same.

He got back to work after a few days and greeted Minho with a small smile. He answered all of Minho’s worried questions with simple words.

He needed to plan this. He packed his things necessary since he didn’t know how long would he be staying there, buying the plane ticket, getting ready but then he realized that he didn’t knew where Jonghyun was staying.

He had to ask Minho about it. Waiting against Minho’s locker, he lifted his head up when the door to the locker room was opened.

“Hyung?” called Minho. He smiled at the younger boy. “Hey, Minho. Can I ask you a favor?”

“What is it?”

“Can you... ask Jonghyun where he is living right now?” said Kibum silently while playing with his fingers. He could tell that Minho was surprised with his sudden request but only to Minho he could ask for help now.

“Why do you ask?”

Kibum took a deep breath before explaining, “I... I want to go there and clear everything. I took a month vacation to the boss and I booked a plane ticket for tomorrow’s schedule... Can you help me?”

He felt Minho’s gaze on him and he could see the corner of his lips was curved up into a small smile. “What do you feel for him, hyung?”

Kibum was taken aback at the question before a smile crept on his lips. He fiddled with his fingers and hummed, “I thought it was just a mere crush... but then I realized that it is too deep already.”

Yeah, he admitted it now.

Minho smiled so wide and took a step closer, standing in front of him, with Kibum staring weirdly at him. Minho hugged him in sincerity and Kibum felt himself smiling at his act. He embraced the taller boy back and pressed his face against his shoulder.

“Finally. It’s about the time, hyung. You should have done this from the very beginning. When I said he is a good man, he is. He would never hurt anyone.”

“But I hurt him already...” murmured Kibum against his shoulder. He felt Minho shook his head no. “He won’t say anything about it. He is just like that, golden heart. He will forgive you even though sometimes he just can’t accept something we do.”

Kibum smiled before sighing, “Do you think he will accept me, Minho? I mean, I did scare him away, right? I told him to get off and leave me the fuck alone.”

Minho hummed at his question, “You won’t know if you don’t try, right? If he rejects you this time... I’ll go there and kick some senses into his brain.”

Kibum chuckled and hummed. “Yeah, you sure have to. Thanks, Minho. I owe you a lot.”

Shaking his head no, Minho chuckled, “At least you are happy, hyung. You and Jonghyun hyung are my favorite hyungs and seeing you two happy together brings certain happiness to me.”

“Thanks, buddy.”

***

Jonghyun was in the middle of stuffing his mouth with his simple dinner when his phone rang. He grinned when he saw that the caller was Minho. Did this little dongseng of his was missing him?

“Hey, Minho!”

“Hyung, how are you?” greeted Minho with a wide smile.

Jonghyun grinned before stuffing his mouth with another spoon of kimchi fried rice. “I’m great! What about you, Minho? How’s life?”

“Fine, never been this great, hyung.”

“That’s good to hear! So, what’s up, Minho? Is it noon there?”

“Yeah. Are you eating now, hyung? I can hear your munching sounds,” teased Minho with a light laugh. Jonghyun grinned and hummed as the answer, continuing to joke around with Minho. They talked for a few more minutes before finally Minho broke the news.

“Hey, hyung, where do you live now?”

“Why are you asking? Are you going to visit me soon?” asked Jonghyun playfully before gulping down his juice. Minho laughed from the other line and murmured the playful, “Yeah, I will visit you soon.”

“For real, Minho?”

“Who knows I get the money one day and I’m going to visit you! You better wait for me and I will surprise you with my arrival!”

Jonghyun laughed and hummed, “Alright! I will wait for your arrival! I will text you my address later, okay?”

“Yeah, sure. Take care, hyung! Talk to you soon!”

Kibum had Minho driven him to the airport. He heard how Minho was blabbering the ‘good lucks’ to him repeatedly, and he smiled to himself. With one hand clutching onto a small piece of paper containing Jonghyun’s address in his coat pocket, Kibum made his way to Paris.

To meet Jonghyun.

“So, take care, hyung. Call me when you arrive there, okay? Don’t make me worry,” said Minho and Kibum felt his heart thumped in happiness. He laughed and he felt very relieved. He had never laughed this free since a few years ago.

“I will! Don’t worry too much, you will grow old faster!”

With a few more goodbyes, Kibum got into the plane, heart throbbing in nervousness at the thought of meeting Jonghyun in a few more hours.

Jonghyun, here I come.

***

Jonghyun did not expect that the early knocking on his door would lead him to see someone that he thought would never meet again.

There stood the love of his life, Kim Kibum, with this pretty smile of his.

“K-K-Kibum?!”

“Hey. You just woke up?” grinned Kibum while readjusting the strap of his backpack. Jonghyun dumbly nodded his head, mind still wondering and pondering about whether he woke up already or still deeply in his sleep.

Seeing his surprised face, Kibum chuckled before he laughed heartily. “So... can I come in?”

Jonghyun nodded his head with a loud ‘oh!’ before stepping aside; letting Kibum entered his new messy apartment. Kibum hummed, taking off his shoes while he ran his eyes here and there. He could feel Jonghyun’s burning gaze on the back of his head, and he smiled.

“K-Kibum, what are you doing here? I-I mean, how come you are here?”

With a smile, Kibum turned around to face him and sighed contently. “We need to talk.”

The older man tilted his head in confusion and Kibum had to chuckle at the adorable sight. “We have a lot to talk. Do you have time?”

“Y-Yeah?”

Jonghyun guided him to the small living room and told him to sit while he walked into the kitchen to get some juice. Kibum was his first guest ever since he moved here. The younger man fidgeted nervously, fingers fiddling with his jacket. When Jonghyun came back and gave him a glass of orange juice, he thanked him and smiled.

“What is it that you want to talk about? Do you come here alone? With Minho? Where’s he? Or do you come with someone else? Your... boyfriend...?”

Kibum chuckled at the tons of questions that Jonghyun threw at him, but his heart clenched at the last question as Jonghyun asked it very carefully. The topic was still fresh, I see.

“Okay, first, I came here alone. Minho is still safely in Korea, and I...don’t have a boyfriend. That is what I’m going to talk about.”

“Yes?” asked Jonghyun. He was sometimes this dumb that Kibum had to sigh.

“I... There’s this misunderstanding that I have to clear with you.”

“Mis...understanding?” asked Jonghyun again, dumbly. Kibum simply nodded his head and sighed. “I’m going to tell you a story and you better not cutting me in the midway. Okay?”

Jonghyun could only nod. Kibum could be pretty intimidating.

Then he told Jonghyun about his previous partners. He was this one cheerful boy, meeting lots of people and got tons of people confessing to him. Kibum knew he was attractive enough to turn everyone’s attention to him.

He got into a relationship with this one man and everything was going well. Until one day, Kibum found this man sleeping around with random women in his bed, in their bed. Spilling out the beans, the man was only after his ass. Nothing more. And they broke up.

His life kept on going after the breakup, before finally he met a new man. He was all sweet and nice, handsome and gentle, but then he was such a bastard in the end. Kibum said that the man was having a bet his friends about how he would be able to bed Kibum in a month. And they broke up.

Kibum felt this disappointment filling his heart with his fail relationships. In a few more months, he met this one man in one certain cafe and they got along well. He kept on pestering Kibum, calling him pretty and beautiful and all sweet things, but then he turned out to be this fucking bastard. He threatened to hit him if he resisted fucking with him. Kibum was sure that he could defend himself if he wanted, but Minho beat him up for him. And they broke up.

“I think... I have a bit trauma in being a relationship, that’ why I acted like that to you. I’m sorry about that.”

Jonghyun gripped onto his empty glass of orange juice, knuckles turned white as he heard about Kibum’s previous fail relationship with those bastards. He would never do that to Kibum. Never.

“And then Minho had also told me how he didn’t see anything good from those men. I didn’t believe him at all before, but then in the end turned out all of his words were true. They were dicks,” said Kibum with a light laugh.

Jonghyun remained silent, eyes locked onto his brown couch.

“I got a job in my current place and then there is someone named Donghyun. Minho warned me about how this man was no different from those before, and this time I believed him. Donghyun seemed to not know when to give up and he kept on pestering me, so I got annoyed with him. That was when you heard everything, right?” asked Kibum carefully.

Jonghyun stopped rotating his glass and froze. He glanced at Kibum for a second, before breaking a forced smile. “W-What are you talking about?”

Kibum sighed at his attempt of denying that, “I... know that you heard everything, Jonghyun. This is where I want to explain to you. I... I know that I said all of those things, but please, you have to hear me out. That Donghyun was bringing up your name and I didn’t like it. I really did not like him and I spoke like that. If I didn’t say that, I was afraid that he would come to you and made a mess, so... I had to say that. I didn’t mean it... about you. I swear.”

Jonghyun took a deep breath and cleared his throat awkwardly. “D-Do you want another glass? I have a lot,” said Jonghyun with a forced grin, before he stood up and walked away to the kitchen.

Kibum bit his lip and stood up as well, following the older man. “Jonghyun, you don’t believe me, right?”

Jonghyun stopped by the counter, putting the glass down. “No, I don’t.”

“I know that my words hurt you but you have to believe me. I mean—”

“What am I to you?” asked Jonghyun silently, still not facing him as he closed his eyes. He wanted to cry again.

“Am I really no one to you?”

Kibum sighed and took steps closer, stopping right behind him. He wrapped his arms around Jonghyun’s waist, face buried against his strong shoulder.

“I like you. I like you a lot. You are not a ‘no one’ to me.”

Jonghyun kept on silent and felt how Kibum’s hold around him was tightening in each second of his silence. He felt his heart was about to jump out from his chest. Having Kibum held him this close, even more, hearing that Kibum liked him were kind of like dream.

“...do you pity me now?” He had to make sure. Jonghyun just wanted to make sure. He didn’t want to feel insecure anymore.

Shaking his head no against Jonghyun’s shoulder, Kibum sighed. “No. I thought I was locking myself in my own insecurity. But then you came along. You showed me everything that I asked for, and I was really thankful about that. I guess... I can say that... I love you now.”

Jonghyun smiled, one tear slipped from the corner of his eye. He took a deep breath before turning around in one swift move, enveloping Kibum in a tight embrace. Kibum was taken aback at his sudden act but then he laughed.

“Kibum, you don’t know how that means a lot to me.”

The younger man hummed and hugged him back, nodding his head. “And you don’t know how you mean a lot to me.”

Kibum closed his eyes. How he missed this chance before. But then he grabbed it again. He had Jonghyun is his arms. He realized that he loved Jonghyun a bit too deep now.

“Say that again, Kibum-ah,”

“Say what?”

“Those words. Those three magical words!” exclaimed Jonghyun in his child-like voice. Kibum chuckled in amusement before humming, “I love you.”

“Again!”

“I love you, Jonghyun.”

“Once more?”

“I love you, stupid. Stop being a dork.”

Jonghyun grinned at Kibum’s curt attitude. His Kibum was back. Yes, his.

“Could you let me go now?” asked Kibum. Jonghyun shook his head like a cute pup he was, earning a sigh and a light hit on the back of his head. He whined but he complied on letting Kibum go. The younger man smirked at him and rummaged into his pocket, looking for something. Jonghyun just stood there, waiting for him in curiosity.

“Here,” whispered Kibum while pulling out the star-shaped necklace. Jonghyun’s eyes widened and he gaped. “H-How—”

“Minho.”

“M-Minho? Did he stalk me?!” Jonghyun questioned in shock. Kibum chuckled and shrugged. “I think so. He could be a stalker sometimes.”

“Oh my God! He saw me cried!”

With one eyebrow lifted, Kibum smirked, “You cried?”

Jonghyun quickly slapped his hand over his mouth, shaking his head. Kibum laughed at his adorable act, pushing the necklace into Jonghyun’s other free palm. “Put it on me. Hurry!”

He turned around and Jonghyun shakily unlocked the necklace. He still couldn’t believe that this was real. Was this a dream? But then when he heard Kibum’s grunt of ‘hurry up!’ Jonghyun grinned widely before putting the necklace on the younger man’s neck.

Kibum turned around and smirked, arms going up to wrap around Jonghyun’s neck. “I don’t usually let someone I date to kiss me even after a month... but I think you are an exception.”

And with that, he pressed his lips against Jonghyun who had his eyes wide opened in shock. He didn’t think Kibum would be this... frontal.

Kibum grinned as he pulled back, “Close your eyes, silly,” before he leaned forward for their second kiss.

This time, Jonghyun did close his eyes tightly.

***

“So, did you come here just to be with me?” asked Jonghyun cheekily as they settled down on the couch; Kibum leaning his head on his shoulder. Kibum leaned back with furrowed eyebrows, chuckling in disbelief.

“Why? You want to brag about it?”

“Yeah! I mean, you came after me! I was so happy!”

Kibum laughed loudly, throwing his head back against his shoulder. Jonghyun blinked with a grin; there were a lot of Kibum’s expressions that he had to learn more. He was so pretty.

“Yeah, yeah, I did. Everything I did was only for you. Happy?”

With a wide smile, Jonghyun nodded his head. “Very happy!”

“You went away without saying anything, by the way.”

“I did say something to you!” protested Jonghyun.

“Yeah indeed you were.”

“Did Minho tell you what I said?”

“No. But he put the phone for me to hear. You know, you were talking to me that time.”

“R-Really? Oh my God, Minho you dick...” murmured Jonghyun through his gritted teeth.

Kibum smirked, “Why? Afraid I would know your feeling, baby boy?”

“Yeah—I mean no. Of course not!” defended Jonghyun, flustered.

“Yeah, yeah, keep denying. I know your feeling already.”

“Can’t you at least act like you like it, Kibum?” whined Jonghyun with round eyes. Kibum scoffed.

“Yeah, I like it.”

“You don’t mean it!” Jonghyun acted like he was offended.

“Geez. I like it a lot, Jonghyun, thank you very much. I like to know your feeling that I even cried when you talked. Okay?”

“...for real? You cried, Kibummie?” asked Jonghyun silently, palms cradling his own cheeks in fake admiration.

Kibum cleared his throat and looked away. Jonghyun felt like grinning so wide that he shook Kibum’s arm.

“Tell me, tell me~!”

“For God’s sake, yes! Now shut up,” said Kibum before he snuggled closer to him. Oh, Jonghyun felt his heart was going to explode from too much happiness.

“Hey, Kibum?”

“What?”

“How long are you going to stay here?” asked Jonghyun hopefully. Kibum sighed. “Why? You don’t want me to be here?” he teased. Jonghyun quickly shook his head, arms quickly hugging him by his slim waist before he could go anywhere further.

“No! I love you very much to let you go!”

Jonghyun could be so blunt sometimes that Kibum felt his cheeks were burning in embarrassment. He groaned and hit Jonghyun’s face with a cushion, “Shut up.”

The older man seemed to see his red face and grinned. “You blush? Kibum? Oh God, this is amazing!”

“Shut up!” groaned Kibum before pushing the cushion more to his face. Jonghyun grinned and tightened his hold around his waist, erupting a laugh from Kibum.

Oh, his little boyfriend was ticklish there...

“Don’t you dare!” screamed Kibum before Jonghyun trapped him with his arms, fingers tickling the poor man into loud laughter. Kibum wriggled under him, leaning against the couch to avoid his evil fingers but failed miserably.

He panted when Jonghyun stopped torturing him, opening his teary eyes to see that Jonghyun was laughing so handsomely. He smiled, feeling his chest warmed by the sight, feeling his heart fluttered, and feeling his stomach did a flip inside.

With a content smirk, Kibum grabbed onto Jonghyun’s cheeks, smiling attractively. “Since we have been through a lot... you deserve another kiss.”

Jonghyun would gladly claim his gift.

***

“Hey, Jjong!”

“Mm?”

“I forgot to tell Minho! He told me to call him as soon as I arrived!” yelled Kibum from the kitchen, hands cooking their dinner. Jonghyun face palmed himself, “It’s been a week and you forgot him like that?”

“Well, you distracted me a lot with your handsome face, thank you very much.”

Jonghyun grinned at his answer and hummed, “It’s tolerable. I understand.”

“Stupid.”

“Do you want me to message him?” asked Jonghyun and Kibum hummed. “Use my phone!”

Jonghyun took the younger man’s phone from the coffee table, unlocking the screen and his heart warmed by the background picture.

It was the sight of his abandoned wilted tulips, seated in a vase full of fresh water on top the table.

Jonghyun smiled and sighed contently, typing the message to Minho before he got an idea. He ran to the kitchen, grabbing Kibum by his waist.

“What are you doing?” protested Kibum.

“Let’s take a picture. Send it to Minho as a gift.”

Kibum laughed and leaned his head back on Jonghyun’s shoulder, smiling brightly to the camera and laughed when Jonghyun jumped in giddy on his spot.

“Have you sent it yet?” asked Kibum.

“Yeah. I sent it very nicely.”

“Now, come here, Jjong. Dinner’s ready.”

“Sure! I’m so hungry!”

“You said that everytime I cook.”

“But, Kibummie...”

“Eat a lot.”

“Bummie~”

“Shut up, you pup.”

“But you love this pup~”

“Unfortunately.”

“I love you, Bummie~”

“I know.”

“Won’t you say that to me?”

“I did.”

“Come on, again~”

“No!”

“Kibum!”

“Jonghyun, shut up!”

“I will shut my mouth if you say it!”

“Shit...”

“I’m waiting~”

“...i love you too, dumbass.”

  
  
_Thank you, Minho! We owe you a lot! Oh, here’s a picture of us so that you won’t miss the happiness! Love, Jonghyun and Kibum._

  
  


##  **_ The End _ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... I had been wondering for years whether I should cross post this story to here or just let it buried deep in the original site... Truthfully speaking, my heart still aches everyday with the lost of our beautiful JH (even spelling his name hurts me, I'm not lying) but I decided that I wanted to keep the memories here in AFF and AO3 as well as those two are the sites that I frequenty visit nowadays.
> 
> The writings were messy and so childish, I know. There were probably tons of mistakes too, I know. But I chose not to edit out anything as a reminder for me that I have grown up and that my 2014 style of writing was very different to my writing style right now.
> 
> Some of you might have read this so many years ago; some of your maybe haven't at all.
> 
> I'm no popular writer, nor a good one, but I wrote with my own imagination only and that's enough for me I think.
> 
> So guys, I hope you enjoyed the old story that I present to you just now! Please be positive and be kind to me haha
> 
> I purposely posted this on his birthday, just because I want a special date to remember this 'historical' moment. lol hahaha
> 
> Enough speaking, I think I will end this pretty long ass writer note here. Thank you for everyone who has spared their precious time to read this story.
> 
> Good bless you all! Be happy, stay positive, and I hope you all are healing just like me.
> 
> Lastly, happy birthday my love Jonghyun. Please be happy up there and watch over us with a smile.


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